By Golly, It Was Good News

We spent half an hour or more speaking with Dad's oncologist. Four of his nine children showed up to share the moment with him, to support him. Even though the tumor marker numbers in his blood are going up, a problem, of course, the tumors have not changed. His brain is clear of malignancies. His esophagus, where this journey began, is clear...that tumor has disappeared. He will start a new chemo regime tomorrow. He's willing to give it a chance, and if it doesn't work, head for Arizona.

We can live with that. He can too. I'm hoping for a long, long time.

December--Yikes

I was able to go to help a daughter over the Thanksgiving holiday, and now that she's all fixed up, she can eat again. Yea! And it was so nice to see her, Josh, and the grandkids. They are getting so big (the grandkids. I think Josh and Katie are getting smaller). And now it is time to get serious about putting together the gift baskets I'm giving my kids and grandkids. Notwithstanding Christmas, I have four grandkids who have birthdays this month.

I stopped in at Dad and Carmen's on Thanksgiving on my way out of town...wow, they had a crowd at their house. It was great to see all the kids and grandkids surrounding the folks. Carmen smiled as she told me about it. It made her very happy.

When I got up this morning, the fog was floating in the valley, turning the view into magic. I just love the magic in my life. It's a good day in paradise.

Grandma bologna and other thoughts

My two kidlets and I slept out on the front lawn Tuesday night to watch the meteor shower. Unfortunately, we fell asleep and when the alarm rang at 2 a.m. (the best part of the show), no one wanted to wake up. But we did sleep outside and that was lovely. I was grandma bologna with a kid snudged up against me on both sides. In fact, I spent a couple nights as grandma bologna due to the fact that the short guys were getting homesick and lonely for their mommies and sleeping with grandma seemed to make it better. My buddies left on Wednesday and my house is so quiet and everything seems to stay where I put it now and there are no incredibly interesting conversations to listen to so here I am in paradise by myself. Peace is nice. Quiet is nice. I miss the laughter the most. Somehow kids come with an innate sense for joy that sucks you into their vortex and fills you up with smiles. I miss my kids and grandkids. Excuse me while I have a little pity party……..

……Ok, I’m better now.

NEXT

It’s hot today and supposed to be upwards of 108° F tomorrow. Do you know what that means? RIPE TOMATOES!!! I had a dozen cherry and grape tomatoes yesterday. Ate most of them as I picked them. Warm and sweet and bursting with the bite. I’m thinking I will sleep during the day (the only air conditioner lives in my bedroom—thank heavens) and putz during the night when it’s cooler. We’ll see how that goes. I don’t work next week, but have work the week after. Perhaps something will come up next week. I hope so. Temp work has been fun. The people I’ve worked with have been exceptional, the work interesting, and time passes quickly. But I want MY OWN JOB. Oh well, I’ll keep working on that one. I’m doing an infant massage class on Saturday at the Y. Put out introductory letters with referral pads to a couple docs last week. Something will come together. Either massage or something else. I don’t know.

AND FINALLY

I’ve been reading my scriptures and came across a passage that is helping me today. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed and discouraged because I can’t seem to generate massage appointments (I know, I’m spoiled. My original practice was huge and starting over sucks). And I apply for jobs but nothing so far. So not only am I broke in the finest sense (only financially, a temporary situation but still discouraging) but I am struggling to define the direction I want my life to go in. In other words, at a time when some of my friends are talking about retiring, I’m trying to figure out what I’m going to be when I grow up and what I want to do with the rest of my life. Curious turn of events, don’t you think?

In Proverbs 3:5-6, I found comfort.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy path.”

8-15-08

WELCOME TO ME

Ok so I haven't put colored borders or sparkly fireworks or fancy fonts here (who can tell me how to do that stuff?) but I thought I'd try this blogging thing. I enjoy reading your blogs. I'm not sure anyone will enjoy reading mine, and I'm not sure I'm real concerned about it right now.

I live in paradise, those who visit even say so. A cherry orchard in the back yard. The canyon in front complete with a river, some lakes, mountains. Who could ask for more. Oh yes, and there's my little garden. You know when you plant tomato plants they are ...what ... 6 inches tall. So I planted 10 of them. Some of them are now taller than me. We've had such a cold winter and spring that they are just starting to turn red. I ate my first day before yesterday. My second yesterday. I'm going out and pick another this evening. I love eating them while they are warm and their little tomato hearts are still beating. Several are turning ripe. In another couple weeks I should be up to my eyeballs in tomatoes. I can hardly wait. I have peppers, a bunch, with two ready to pick. My pumpkins look like they are making happy little pumpkin babies, the squash too. Beets and carrots are coming along. I can't remember why I planted chives. What on earth do you do with chives? Oh, I remember, I went in at the end of the potted plant season and they were massively on sale. So I said to myself-self, why not try em. Anyone know what one does with garlic chives? I'm so happy when I go out and water my little garden. I planted some flowers. Some are blossoming, some are just green piles of leaves or something, but they look pretty. Note to self: study which plants make flowers and which are ground huggers before next year. (Again, the lot of them were on sale...nuff said).

My children and grandchildren have come to visit over the last week or two. That was WONDERFUL!! I sent five home Monday and picked two more up today. Before that, four spent the week with me. I just love rocking a little one to sleep, singing to her and having her sing back. Makes me smile just to think about it. And each one of them, they are getting so big and so smart and they are all so beautiful. What a lucky grandma I am, that's for sure. I look at my children living their lives and wrestling with reality and sometimes I ache for them. At this moment about all I can do to help them is pray for them. But they too are all very smart, beautiful, compassionate people. See how lucky I am. It is a challenging time for all of us right now. And the rest of my family. What a blessing they all are to me. And my friends. How they put up with my silliness. We have two family members who are in the military. How I appreciate their sacrifice, the sacrifice of one's wife and children to have husband and daddy gone, oh my, but it is hard to see it. God Bless America and all our troops where ever they are.

So that's what's up with me. Tomorrow I'm taking my two eight-year-olds to town. We'll play in the park, do some grocery shopping, come home and make goodies and popcorn to take to the drive in movies tomorrow night. We'll glean cherries in the morning. Many are in the process of becoming raisins around their pits, but we may find a good one or two. And at some point, we need to make a batch of bread. Probably tonight when it cools off. That way we can have sandwiches tomorrow.

That's it from paradise for now.